Two years have almost past since my last blog. Funny, I had a ton I could of wrote about, but none of which I cared for all to know. It hasn't been the proudest last two years I can certainly say that. Many areas of my life were tested. To think back I thought I failed miserably. What I am startin to realize is I am conquering and was just fighting the whole time. Tired, worn down, beaten from it all, I'm gaining my footing again and ready to kick some ass.
In a matter of a couple of years I almost lost a son, I lost my faith, I let go of my marraige, my business was put on hold for how long I didn't know, my hopes of any financial stability were no longer there. I through my hands in the air and said "I'M DONE!"
Today... I am gaining my faith back trying to focus on thanking God more for the everyday little things he blesses me with. I am AMAZED and so grateful I have a husband that stuck by me. He chose to put up with a lot and chose not to walk away. And FINALLY after working crazy schedules and lots and lots of hours I feel like its all coming together. Brian will be working from home soon in August, we hope, crossing our fingers. I had a New Job Opportunity come to me and I am more than excited about it. I will be working for Baby Bella Photography starting Aug. 15th taking pics of Newborns at Lawrence Medical Center. Its a Monday thru Friday from 9am to anywhere from 1pm to 5pm. Whoa.. Time..more time to be with my kiddos and family and more time to do some of my own photography again on the side.
We still have several obstacles to overcome and I will probably be working at Carmax part time for awhile, but the blessings just keep coming and after a couple of years of Hell I feel like I might be able to just breath again.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Benign Sleep Myoclonus in infancy
This is what Jakob was diagnosed with. Its nice to have the information and a name with what he was doing and what was going on with him. The twitching that you see in the video is exactly what Jakob would do. Click on the link.
Overwhelmed, but this time with love and blessings!!
Sitting down at the computer for the first time today after a day of running from here and there, I started to edited, continuing on with the pile of work that is waiting on me. I have just returned from a friends home of which decided to help us out by showering us with some amazing gifts and providing some wonderful advise. I can't get in the mood to edit, I can even pull out work right now, but instead feel the need to share the wonderful amazing things that have happened to us in spite of the bad.
The devil wants us so easily to overlook the positive in our lives and let the negativity take hold. In knowing this, I have realized that I have given little to the positive in my blog.
Let me start with the present and work my way backwards. Friends... oh my Lord do we have some loving, trusting, compassionate friends around us and many of them. Never have I felt so much love from the day Jakob was born to present. In going through the drama and the pain that we have lately, those friends, true friends come out of the wood work and have been there for us in many ways. I have a very giving heart and to be in a situation where I feel limited because I am so caught up in all that is around us, makes it hard to receive. I wanna be in that place to do for those I love, but have had to learn to take gifts as well. Its humbling on one end, but on the other, as I sit here with tears running down my face because I am overwhelmed with the amazing blessings of friends, it heals my heart and lifts my spirits to know how lucky we are.
Secondly, the basic positive events that have given us time to breath in times when it doesn't seem possible. We were approved through healthwave.. thank GOD! Jakob is over a $100,000 baby so that was a answered prayer right there.
Also, the last check of Brians covered what we needed it to cover for the month,
and compared to last years August,which was my slowest month with no orders at all, I have received tons of orders this August which is great news considering how money is tight these days.
I met with the neurologist today and Jakob is doing great. I have a name for the seizures he was having and what those were all about and start lowering his dosage till he is completely off of phenobarbital.. yeah.
Brian is Coaching for Shawnee Mission North Freshman team. He is finally doing what he loves and he gets paid pretty well for it for the time he puts in.
Thirdly, family.. and do note that I am putting these things in order of not importance but in the order in which I can say the blessings have come from present to past, just to eliminate any sensitivity. Just as I am overwhelmed with friends I am with family as well. We have had to ask for some favors and some help and that isn't easy for us to do at all and you have pulled through for us even when it wasn't exactly the right time or perhaps you didn't have it to give at the time and yet you still helped.
We have so many people to hug, so many people to thank, so many thank you letters to send, something of which I am horrible about. Your concerns, your prayers, your help, your advise and your listening ears have meant everything to us.
What was our issues again?? I can't seem to remember?
The devil wants us so easily to overlook the positive in our lives and let the negativity take hold. In knowing this, I have realized that I have given little to the positive in my blog.
Let me start with the present and work my way backwards. Friends... oh my Lord do we have some loving, trusting, compassionate friends around us and many of them. Never have I felt so much love from the day Jakob was born to present. In going through the drama and the pain that we have lately, those friends, true friends come out of the wood work and have been there for us in many ways. I have a very giving heart and to be in a situation where I feel limited because I am so caught up in all that is around us, makes it hard to receive. I wanna be in that place to do for those I love, but have had to learn to take gifts as well. Its humbling on one end, but on the other, as I sit here with tears running down my face because I am overwhelmed with the amazing blessings of friends, it heals my heart and lifts my spirits to know how lucky we are.
Secondly, the basic positive events that have given us time to breath in times when it doesn't seem possible. We were approved through healthwave.. thank GOD! Jakob is over a $100,000 baby so that was a answered prayer right there.
Also, the last check of Brians covered what we needed it to cover for the month,
and compared to last years August,which was my slowest month with no orders at all, I have received tons of orders this August which is great news considering how money is tight these days.
I met with the neurologist today and Jakob is doing great. I have a name for the seizures he was having and what those were all about and start lowering his dosage till he is completely off of phenobarbital.. yeah.
Brian is Coaching for Shawnee Mission North Freshman team. He is finally doing what he loves and he gets paid pretty well for it for the time he puts in.
Thirdly, family.. and do note that I am putting these things in order of not importance but in the order in which I can say the blessings have come from present to past, just to eliminate any sensitivity. Just as I am overwhelmed with friends I am with family as well. We have had to ask for some favors and some help and that isn't easy for us to do at all and you have pulled through for us even when it wasn't exactly the right time or perhaps you didn't have it to give at the time and yet you still helped.
We have so many people to hug, so many people to thank, so many thank you letters to send, something of which I am horrible about. Your concerns, your prayers, your help, your advise and your listening ears have meant everything to us.
What was our issues again?? I can't seem to remember?
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